Week off, but not really.

I'm at the hospital. Not for me, but I'm waiting for my wife to be discharged from gallbladder surgery. It's just a day surgery, and I was supposed to wait at home for them to call and let me know that she was ready, but I got impatient. Well, that's not entirely true; I got a call, and when I tried to pull the phone off of my belt, it slipped and the battery pack fell off. In a panic, I ran upstairs to the other extension, but missed the call. I got the number that called, but it wouldn't connect to anyone (what I reached sounded like dialing. Odd...) So I called the hospital, and the person I spoke to didn't think that the phone number was theirs. That wasn't a certain enough answer for me, so I packed up a few things (my netbook, Ipod, and three books) and came down.
She's not ready. Fortunately, Chickerdoodles is with Gramma, so I don't have to co-ordinate her and a thoroughly anesthetized wife.
That's how far I got before the volunteer told me that she was ready. By “ready”, they meant awake but waiting for the doctor to officially discharge her. While the nurses and volunteers at our local hospital were as delightful and efficient as always, the doctors are stretched too thin, so waiting for them to come and sign-off can be like waiting for a long weekend on Thursday. They're doing their best, but there seriously needs to be something done about the availability of doctors in Ontario. But I digress.
Andrea is recovering well. I thought that she'd be a mess, but she bounced back like the trooper she is. Of course, with four small incisions in her abdomen, there will be no lifting, including said Chickerdoodles. Fortunately, I was able to book the week off, so I can do the lifting, and the nursing. Also fortunately, she is twenty months old, so I only have to nurse my wife. Try and shake that visual – you're welcome. Hopefully I can get some other things done with my week off, but honestly, my standards are set pretty low.

The worst part about having toddlers...

There are a few things that I've noticed since the toddler TV shows have taken residence in our home. The first may very well be the worst part about having kids. The jingly theme songs have a way of sticking in one's head. Now that I'm working in the parking lot, I don't have the distractions to keep them at bay, so I can be tormented for an unreasonable amount of time.

Barney isn't half as annoying as I've been led to believe. Of course, the first episode I saw had him saying how much he loved books. That fellow's alright with me.

My opinion of Bert & Ernie is the same as it was when I was five. What else could one infer from a pair of guys who share a room and argue a lot? They act like brothers. That's it. So if those who see otherwise could please retire the homophobic bullocks now, that would be super.

But those guys in the tights? They are certainly wearing cups. That shape is just to regular to be naturally occurring, no matter how much they avoid manscaping.

There's something I found really exciting. The Cat In The Hat is voiced by Martin Short. Said Cat was also played by Mike Meyers (that move was great, by the by). Jim Carrey played Horton (who heard a Who) and the Grinch. Have you spotted the pattern? It takes a Canadian to properly portray Dr Seuss. Does that make up for our action-hero shortage? Well, we make up for it in our “Love Scenes.” Those are hard to beat, this side of the Atlantic, anyway.

Is This How We Got Here?

I'm reading an interesting book right now, but I'm not sure what to make of it. It's “The 12th Planet” by Zecheriah Sitchen. I've been wanting to read it for years, but there was always other books; you know how it goes.

It's the first in a series, and it's researched from translations of the Sumerian tablets. He interprets the tales of the gods as alien settlers in prehistory. Don't laugh, it really is a viable theory. The problem is, he is really sold on his interpretation of the tablets. He is always using phrases like “It's obvious that this means...” or “There can be no doubt..,” and not just a few times. Such phrases appear every couple of pages. I'm not sure why this bothers me, but I would have liked to see a healthy dose of cautious skepticism.

This is a little harsh to say, but it really looks like he is reading the Sumarian texts in such a way as to make them fit his theories. This is like calling a Believer a “Heretic,” but that's how it reads. I did kinda pick up this book hoping to verify what I wanted to believe, so it made me that much more skeptical, guarding myself against being swept away into a pet theory. I'm hoping that one of you has read more of his work, and if you could set me straight, that would be fabulous.